Valentines and Vows


February 14, 2013 by Angel Pricer

couple breaking up

I admit it. I’m taking advantage of you. It is Valentine’s Day, after all, and you’re probably expecting to see a nice whole heart with two loving people this photo.  Yet, your curiosity as to why someone would post a picture like this today, of all days, got the best of you, right? Good!

While the true roots of Valentine’s Day are obscure, it is most notably all about love. When a couple exchanges vows, it is with the agreement that they wish to spend the rest of their lives together…in love. Yet, both Valentines and Vows are suggestive of those feel-good lovey-dovey moments between two people.

However, as you may have noticed, not every moment in a relationship feels good. In fact, some of the most potent growth spurts between two committed individuals occur when things feel just plain AWFUL.

Vows are great, and love is ever present and impermeable to the keen observer. Yet, when that love threatens to lay waste to your familiar comforts, what keeps you staying in your relationship while continuing to grow together?

There are plenty of couples who have met marital milestones while emotionally left starving on separate continents. What I’m interested in is a vow to stay and grow through the rough spots.

As a real woman in a relationship with real man, each capable of exhibiting moments of wonder and woe, I’ve discovered a thing or two about those familiar cycles of painful issues that creep to the surface every now and then. Except, of course, on Valentine’s Day, for this is a special day where things like that don’t happen (yeah, right!).

Whatever your plans are today, I invite you to take a moment to REVIEW and RENEW what brought you two together in the first place.

  • Maybe it was her strength…or his sensitivity

  • Perhaps there was a spark between your hands and you just ‘knew’

  • Were there shared dreams realized but left on the back burner for some future day?

  • What still wants to be created and experienced between you?

Whatever it was or is, I invite you to use what remains of the day to find a way to recommit to your mate in a manner that will anchor your commitment through the tough times of growth every couple faces.

Happy, Vow-Renewing Valentine’s Day!


For the Blog-a-Book Series: I Vow To Stay: How to Grow and Thrive as a Couple Raising Challenging Children

Photo Credit:  smarnad at

2 thoughts on “Valentines and Vows

  1. JDogg says:

    I definitely feel like this is one of your best posts so far. Your language is palpably more at ease here and it feels like a more comfortable fit for you. In some of your earlier entries, it read as though you felt obligated to pepper your sentences with ornate and esoteric words,but the result was not unlike a baroque room with ostentatious furniture wrapped in plastic to keep it safe. Sure, it looks intricate enough, but its impossible for anyone but Louis XIV to feel comfortable lounging about in it. This is more like a clean sedate living room with a plush couch, perfect for curling up in with a good book and a cup of joe. You sound more comfortable here too, so we are better able to relax and have a conversation without worrying about stumbling over our vocabulary when we speak.

    • Angel Pricer says:

      Well, JDogg, your thoughtful comment certainly brightened my day! Learning how to be comfortable, conversational me in my writing is one of my biggest hurdles. I can spend oodles of hours pouring over the prose of well loved others, but when it comes to conveying my own in that way I often wind up coming across as though I’m compensating for my perceived failings.

      Love the living room visual!

      Thank you 🙂

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